The world is vast, limitless and abundant. It is, it really is. But we see only what’s around us, our little social bubble. For some of us, it’s bigger, for some – it stays forever a little, cosy bubble. Unexpected events often throw us out of our comfort zone. Isn’t going out of your mother’s womb the first kick life gives you?
Look back for a moment
Looking back from where I started it’s kind of fascinating how far I’ve got. I was born at the end of the communist era in Bulgaria. We didn’t have all the western goods. Bananas and mandarines were something exotic we got only for Christmas.
The overall message for how life should be was: Go study, do your homework, get a secure job, get married, have kids, save for a pension, be a fair and good person. Not necessary in this order. Not that any of this is bad, but as a child, I didn’t get much of intellectual or international exposure, cultural, educational, or social stimulus.
Being a bold individual wasn’t encouraged. It was more convenient to stick with the crowd and keep your mouth shut. I avoided confrontation, I rather accepted what was thrown my way and dealt with it. Shut up and deal with it.
The horizon is expanding
It wasn’t until my 18th year when I first did my international travel. It was in neighbouring Greece. Back then we had neither a computer nor internet connection.
I didn’t dream big because it was not in my consciousness. Back then I didn’t even imagine how life might look today and the person I would grow into. I saw no independent, beautiful, well-travelled, educated, self-confident women who totally kicked ass.
I had to invent it for myself.
Every next step was revealing a whole new world. There were pain and disappointment at every step. I somehow got close to people whom I could learn from.
The mentors
Along the way, you will meet numerous mentors and I use mentor as a broad term here. A mentor can be anything or anyone. Sometimes even a sentence or a question someone asks you can trigger a whole new explosion. Look around – the opportunities and the right people are just around the corner.
So here is a tribute to some of the mentors on my way:
- My parents who supported me through childhood, school, university years and bought me my first computer
- My boyfriend who’s generously sharing his world with me and encouraging all my creative endeavours
- The friend who taught me how to dress, take care of myself, develop my style and online dating. The same friend taught me to think big and urged me to move into a 100m2 (1076ft²) in the centre of my hometown
- My colleague at the start-up who taught me everything about front-end development, a skill that opened many doors for me
- The Spanish teacher who inspired me to learn the language in no time and eventually spend a year in Spain
- My little sister who’s inspiring me to be a bigger sister with advice and perspective worth sharing
- A colleague who recommended me a meditation app and started my spiritual journey
- Jake Desyllas, the author of the Voluntary Life podcast for shaping my view of personal freedom and showing me the paths to financial independence
- Nokia who believed in me 5+ years ago and offered me a job in Berlin
I can continue forever, but this is the message: If something seems impossible or unreachable at the moment, it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.
To create something, you first have to create it in your consciousness. Then it will appear in reality. – Kate App
Quiet the noise and look within you
What is constant is your inner voice. Deep down I knew I wanted to live in Germany, I knew I will drive a car, speak Spanish and be financially independent. It was not all clear and there were often crossroads without guidance.
There are things which you are naturally drawn to. You might not be interested in dentistry or writing books. But the start-up culture or flying an aeroplane fascinate you. It’s because you have the potential for it. Something in you resonates with it. Look at these spots.
Spend time to expand your consciousness. Years ago it wouldn’t even come to my mind where I would be today, what kind of travels and what kind of style or a person I can be. The revelations often came to me after periods of depression and disappointment. Sometimes a mentor in disguise showed up and led the way for me. Sometimes a combination of those two. The more I expanded my consciousness, the more I found out I can do it intentionally without the need to suffer or be guided by a mentor.
You are responsible for everything that happens to you – the other people are not responsible for how you feel or how you react. It’s you behind the wheel, and the sooner you take control of it, the better. It feels damn good to walk your own way, do your own mistakes, learn your own lessons and win your own battles.
Go for it!
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Photos by Hanny Naibaho and Greg Rakozy on Unsplash